The Sex Myth: The Gap Between Our Fantasies and Reality

The Sex Myth The Gap Between Our Fantasies and Reality Fifty years after the sexual revolution we are told that we live in a time of unprecedented sexual freedom But beneath the veneer of glossy hedonism millennial journalist Rachel Hills argues that we

  • Title: The Sex Myth: The Gap Between Our Fantasies and Reality
  • Author: Rachel Hills
  • ISBN: 9780670076925
  • Page: 468
  • Format: Paperback
  • The Sex Myth: The Gap Between Our Fantasies and Reality

    Fifty years after the sexual revolution, we are told that we live in a time of unprecedented sexual freedom But beneath the veneer of glossy hedonism, millennial journalist Rachel Hills argues that we are in the grip of a new brand of sexual control Cosmopolitan meets Foucault in this full scale investigation of the role that sex plays in today s culture.Coming of age inFifty years after the sexual revolution, we are told that we live in a time of unprecedented sexual freedom But beneath the veneer of glossy hedonism, millennial journalist Rachel Hills argues that we are in the grip of a new brand of sexual control Cosmopolitan meets Foucault in this full scale investigation of the role that sex plays in today s culture.Coming of age in the early 2000s, Rachel Hills felt like a romantic and sexual misfit Raised on a diet of women s magazines, teen soap operas, and media panics over hooking up and raunch culture, she believed that everyone her age was dining at an all you can eat sexual buffet Everyone, that is, but her.When a chance encounter with a new friend challenges her preconceptions, Hills sets out to discover the truth about her generation s sexual cultures, speaking with than 200 people to produce a landmark account of contemporary sexual life What she finds is the sex myth the grand significance we invest in sexuality that once meant we were dirty if we did have sex, and now means we are defective if we don t do it enough.An ambitious mix of sociology, popular culture, and powerful personal stories, The Sex Myth uncovers the invisible norms and unspoken assumptions that shape what we think about sex and accordingly, how we feel about our own sex lives.

    The Sex Myth The Gap Between Our Fantasies and Reality Fulfillment by FBA is a service we offer sellers that lets them store their products in s fulfillment centers, and we directly pack, ship, and provide customer service for these products. Judaism Kosher Sex The primary purpose of sex is to reinforce the marital bond Sexual desire is not evil, but must be satisfied in the proper time, place and manner The Pimping of Prostitution Abolishing the Sex Work Myth The Pimping of Prostitution is the most comprehensive account of the politics of the sex trade I have ever read It goes well beyond raging at the crimes perpetrated against women and girls, although there is a great deal of justified rage at the heart of this book. The Myth That Incels Want Sex Houston Press After Alek Minassian killed ten people in Toronto it was found that he identified with the incel movement, and thus was born a hundred mainstream news outlet think pieces on defining the term. Origin myth An origin myth is a myth that purports to describe the origin of some feature of the natural or social world One type of origin myth is the cosmogonic myth, which describes the creation of the world.However, many cultures have stories set after the cosmogonic myth, which describe the origin of natural phenomena and human institutions within a preexisting universe. Homepage MYTH LIVE ST PAUL, MN Located minutes from St Paul and Minneapolis, Myth Live is the Midwest s premier concert house and event center destination showcasing today s top talent. National myth A national myth is an inspiring narrative or anecdote about a nation s past Such myths often serve as an important national symbol and affirm a set of national values.A national myth may sometimes take the form of a national epic or be incorporated into a civil religion.A group of related myths about a nation may be referred to as the national mythos from the original Greek word The Single Sex School Myth An Overwhelming Body of Feminists tend to be of two minds about single sex schooling One group thinks single sex classes are wonderful for girls because they provide a protected environment in which girls can learn Sex Offender Management Myths and Facts NY DCJS This document presents some of the most common myths concerning sex offenders and summarizes what research has shown concerning these issues. CSOM Publications Myth The majority of sexual offenders are caught, convicted, and in prison Fact Only a fraction of those who commit sexual assault are apprehended and convicted for their crimes Most convicted sex offenders eventually are released to the community under probation or parole supervision.

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    One thought on “The Sex Myth: The Gap Between Our Fantasies and Reality

    1. Rachel Hills

      Growing up, the books that inspired me most were those that put individual experiences into social and political context - books like The Beauty Myth by Naomi Wolf, Female Chauvinist Pigs by Ariel Levy, Status Anxiety by Alain de Botton, or The Feminine Mystique by Betty Friedan. Understanding how my life fit into a bigger picture helped me to feel less alone, and helped me make sense of my experiences.The Sex Myth is my attempt to follow in the tradition of the books I loved. A product of six y [...]

    2. Holly

      This isn't bad, but it is not for me. Might recommend this to a younger person, since I did appreciate reading The Beauty Myth when I was 22 (and Naomi Wolf didn't write very well and her arguments were redundant). But I'd still rather recommend Ariel Levy's more trenchant and well-written Female Chauvinist Pigs (which Hills also cites several times). Here, I absorbed Hills's point in 15 minutes and wasn't terribly interested in the illustrative anecdotes and interviews with 20-somethings whose [...]

    3. ♆ BookAddict✒ La Crimson Femme

      Whenever I see a book mentioning Sex Myth, I'm intrigued to see what it is all about. I picked up Ms. Hills' book with no expectations. In fact, I didn't read the blurb because I wanted to go into this blind with no expectations. And even then, I must have had expectations because the book is not as I expected.It is very clear from the first couple of chapters, Ms. Hills is an ardent feminist. Her writing voice shows her concerns about how sex is still used to bind and constrict us, even in this [...]

    4. Carmen

      Hmm. Given the subject matter, this book was rather dull. Well-researched and written, but very much a "Sexualities 101" kind of book. A very safe book that just. offered nothing new or terribly interesting. But then again, I suspect everything that can be said about sex has already been said, many times over, so what's left to say, really?

    5. Angela Meyer

      The Sex Myth encourages us to think about the way we internalise social norms surrounding sex. The book also articulates the confusing mixed messages about sexual identity for those of us who have grown up in a post-1970s 'sexually free' society that still contains strong remnants of conservatism. We may feel shame for having too much sex or too little sex, or for expressing our sexuality in culturally unacceptable ways (which includes *not* embracing/expressing a sexualised self). Old labels an [...]

    6. ???

      I was looking forward to reading this book, because it was critically acclaimed.Basically this book is about how media culture is obsessed with sex, and wanted to fill the gap between how much sex people have and what they actually have, their unrealistic expectations, how everyone doesn't lose their v-card at 13 and being a 30 year old virgin isn't a big deal. It also goes on about sexual identity (ie. asexuality) and how society attributes too much meaning to sex as an identity. And then it ta [...]

    7. Keira

      [content warning: talks about r*pe, sexual assault, lgbtiqap+-phobia]This was a very interesting book. At first I struggled to relate to some of the pressures that the people Rachel had interviewed were talking about; I had never been that interested in sex I thought, nor felt much pressure to dress in a certain way. Then I remembered feeling a lot of weight attached to the label of 'virgin' and a lot of relief when I got that label out of the way. I still have never dressed up to attract someon [...]

    8. Julia

      Written by a millennial journalist about the millennial experience (with many many interviews with real millennials), this book is a smart, insightful, and honest discussion of the social discourses of sex "norms" and assumptions, gender roles, and the impact of these forces on young people of all genders and sexualities.This book brought up some really great points, and even I, as a gender studies minor in college, found this book to be a nice discussion of the culture and forces affecting youn [...]

    9. Crystal

      This book was really a glorified magazine article. Hills milked the topic way beyond what it was worth. In the end, the book's message - although positive, ie. don't let someone else's sex 'myth' define you - was really more commonsense than anything else. It strikes me as somehow naive to assume that there is anything like 'authentic' sexuality. All of us come into our sexual lives in the context of our culture. This has always been the case - even if the stories around what is acceptable/desir [...]

    10. Michael Livingston

      A valuable piece of work, but one that left me a bit frustrated. The author has clearly decided to aim for as broad an audience as possible, which meant that sections of this felt a bit shallow to me. I wanted a stronger research base, and more engagement with existing literature, but I guess I am a social researcher. I was also put off by Hills' insistence on describing the appearance of every one of her interviewees. It was weird. Having said all of that, there's plenty to appreciate in this b [...]

    11. Taiss

      In the 1940s and 1950s, Kinsey study data research was released and it provoked a great deal of controversy whilst it also opened up society’s collective eyes to the spectrum of human sexuality. Over the following decades, we have seen a blossoming of sexual revolutions and continuing discussions of sexuality, identity and expression. Yet with all of the openness and conversation, there has also been a great deal of stereotyping, idealising, moralising, proselytising and most of all, it seems, [...]

    12. Thoughts inBooks

      I'm a tough sell when it comes to nonfiction sexuality and gender studies books because much of what is being published now has been said before -although perhaps in drier language and with more academic jargon.Rachel Hills presents us with a new look at sexual liberation and what it means to be judged for having too little sex, as well as too much, as well as how to deal with value judgments such as how often, how long, and how exciting. She supports her claims by interjecting interviews she ha [...]

    13. Julene

      I've followed Hills' work online for a while, and spent a year awaiting this release. While I didn't identify with much of the "hills and valleys" within, other Millennials I spoke to about the book (who had not read it) said the synopsis was in line with their experiences.This is a good first book, powered by anecdotes and narrative in mostly a good way. I would've enjoyed more in the way of supporting data, especially when expressed directly in comparison to "what people think" -- one of the f [...]

    14. Meg

      Reminiscent of the thousands of conversations I've had with friends and partners over the years. pairs well with Come As You Are.

    15. Roberta

      Originally posted on Roberta's Literary RamblingsI received that ARC from the publisher in exchange for an honest review. Overall Impression: Hills does a great job of bringing to light a new form of sexual monitoring that as sprung from our new "sexual freedoms" however, to call this a full-scale investigation like the description says is a little over-the-top.Recommended for: Anyone interested in sex and sexuality studies, as well as those who have ever felt that their sex life doesn't add up [...]

    16. Phoebe

      What I liked about this book:-Honest attempt at the looking at the breadth and depth of our cultures and ideals around sex-The distracting masquerade of 'sexual liberation' and how to de-couple sex and sexiness so that it doesn't comprise our whole worth as people (and how current, Western ideals and power structures have aided in sex becoming the only-important-thing -it slices! it dices! it sells cars and lettuce!)-To that end, this quote: "Today, the Sex Myth is sold through a mirage of liber [...]

    17. Rosamund

      First of all, thank you very much to Rachel Hills and her Twitter giveaway that ended up in me winning a copy of this as an audiobook!This book was simultaneously validating and exhausting, encompassing thoughts I’ve been having from since I was about 17 up until now. Interpretations and ways of sex that are off-limits to some, but mean everything to others. It was perturbing to realise how deeply it’s a social game, even if you try to keep it to yourself. The chapter about casual sex and em [...]

    18. Anino

      **ARC received courtesy of Netgalley & the Publisher, in exchange for an honest review**As a (currently single) Gen-X'er with a degree in Sociology, I am always up for reading something academic that explains why our society is either so dysfunctional when it comes to sex, or even why we aren't having as much good sex at all.Although this researcher is from the Millennial cohort, she has managed to craft an intriguing piece of academically sound narrative research that can appeal to just abo [...]

    19. Julia

      Before reading this, I was a little confused as to what "The Sex Myth" refers too, and after reading I feel like I know why. Rachel hills does a wonderful job explaining the Sex Myth and it's many contradicting layers of socially deemed acceptable and unacceptable behavior. I definitely learned somethings, one of the lessons I took away as most important is that however you do "it"--often or not, kinky or vanilla--don't overthink it, everyone has the same worries about it that you do. Although I [...]

    20. Elizabeth

      presented at november 2015 ASSECT, p. 97-99, about desire, misconceptions about desire.heard the author on the radio today on Q cbc/radio/popup/audio/pI liked what she said, except for the part about how she selected her population and how she decided what to talk about with people. It is important to remember she isn't a scientist of any kind and she hasn't studied sex in any academic way. Her 200 people aren't representative of anything. This book is written in a journalistic tradition reachin [...]

    21. Morag

      I have been a fan of Rachel Hill's work since I was in university, so when she announced she was writing her first book I was well and truly IN LINE waiting for it to come out. And as expected, it did not disappoint. Through anecdotes from millennials and Gen Y'ers, Hill argues that the way sex that is depicted in the media and what is sold to us in glossy magazines is not just untrue, but also damaging. And we're not just talking abstinence only education here, we're also talking about the 'lib [...]

    22. Gingamc

      The Sex Myth is a comprehensive look and examination of what we talk about when we talk about sex. If I had the money and the ability to fly an airplane, I'd airdrop this knowledge into the heartland, the halls of Congress, and all the locations with little to no comprehensive sex education. The Sex Myth does a remarkable job at demystifying the codes and stories we swap about all the ways that sex is an intimate (and political and cultural) undertaking. The first person accounts of how they sha [...]

    23. Maxine

      3.5 starsGood topic, good writing, but at times this felt slightly shallow - more depth in certain areas would have been warranted (or at least a list of other books to pair with this one). Hills writes this book with youth in mind - her interviewees range from high-school age to maybe a 'youngish' 27 or 28. Even when I was younger I don't think any of her interviewees reflected my views of sex and sexuality. A wider swath of people to interview would have made this a far more rounded book, but [...]

    24. Zuzka Namu Jakubkova

      Solid piece of research on the discrepancy between how people perceive their sex lives should look like and how do they actually look like. Work of Rachel Hills spans multiple interviewees and several years and provides a good case for dismantling the Sex Myth mainstream media and culture tries to sell us.

    25. Kate Walton

      A lot of this book really resonated with me. I would have loved to have read more of Rachel's discussions with her interviewees, though - I feel like more quotes/stories would have made it stronger.

    26. Lucinda Gardiner

      It reads like an overlong Cosmo piece that the features ed should have hacked into rather than something to be commissioned into book form.

    27. Whitney

      Let me begin by saying that I didn't have any expectations for this book before I started it. The subject matter seemed interesting, and I was curious about Hills feminist analysis of the subject matter, but beyond that I went in with no expectations. Good thing too, because I thought the book was terribly mediocre. In a nutshell, it was an incredibly superficial and dare I say vapid analysis of what she refers to as the "sex myth." Essentially, Hill attempts to "chart how we have moved from a c [...]

    28. Hannah Givens

      Based on the subtitle, I hoped this would be about the role of sexual fantasies and their relationship to sexual acts. It's actually just a book saying "Hey maybe sex isn't the most important thing ever" with a bunch of anecdotes. So, others might find it helpful but I didn't see anything earthshattering and just skimmed most of it.

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